I’m 40 and had about 15 years of consistent exercise until everything fell apart at 37. My body and mind went through a tough time, and since then, I haven’t been working out much.
Now, I’m serious about getting back on track, but I struggle with anxiety about going to the gym. I want to eliminate this excuse by buying adjustable dumbbells and focusing on both low- and high-intensity cardio for up to a year, after which I plan to return to heavy lifting at the gym.
The challenge I’m facing is figuring out how much weight I actually need for the dumbbells. I’ve found a few pairs that go up to 50 or 55 lbs, but I worry that won’t be enough to keep challenging me. I’ll start slowly, so that should work for the first month or two, but I suspect I might need more weight to continue progressing.
For context, I typically weigh around 185 lbs when I’m in good shape, though I’m a bit heavier now. In the past, my lifting numbers weren’t extraordinary. My estimated 2RM was about 225 lbs for the bench (which I never prioritized), around 405 lbs for deadlifts, and roughly 315 lbs for squats. I generally focused on lifting in the 5-8 rep range rather than pure strength. Those numbers feel distant now, but I aim to push myself over the next 6 months to a year and see how much I can regain.
Does anyone have advice or personal experiences to share? While I can make this decision on my own, I haven’t focused solely on dumbbells for an extended period and would love to hear others’ thoughts. Please share if you loved or disliked what you purchased!
I’m a calisthenics enthusiast, so I’ll be upfront that I don’t have a specific answer to your dumbbell question. I just want to say I’m glad to hear you’re doing better and looking to get back into working out.
Regarding personal experiences, I’ve only been injured twice in my life—nothing too serious, thankfully—and both times followed periods of neglect. Anxiety also made it tough for me to get back into it. It’s easy to compare yourself to your past performance and end up pushing too hard. When working out at home, the risk of injury and imbalances increases because you lack supervision for form checks and advice.
I sense some of that anxiety in how you discuss your previous numbers, explaining why they’re not higher. The truth is, it will take time to get back to your heaviest lifts, if you haven’t already surpassed them. And that’s perfectly okay; it can even feel freeing. After this break, you’re in a great position to reap the mental health benefits of working out again, which we all loved at the beginning. If you let go of how much you “used to lift,” I believe the anxiety will fade.
My advice is to enjoy the feeling of starting fresh. It’s great to experience those early gains and add an extra rep each session. It’s far better than risking injury like I did. As for the dumbbells, consider checking secondhand options and let availability guide your choice. A lot of fitness equipment gets unused and ends up on sites like Craigslist. This way, you can avoid getting stuck in decision paralysis on Amazon and save some money. Or try something new, like a pull-up bar! Best of luck!
Thanks for your thoughtful comment. You’re right about some of the reasons behind my anxiety. I’ve been fixating on my former self, both physically and mentally, which makes working out around others quite challenging, especially when they’re in good shape. I definitely find myself thinking about my past performance, and it can be overwhelming. But I’m aware that I’m not as strong as I used to be, so I’m trying to focus on building up from my current reality.
I also struggle with a bit of body dysmorphia, constantly feeling like I’m overweight. While I’ve gained some weight, I know intellectually that I’m not fat; my feelings just don’t align with that reality.
On top of that, I’m dealing with generalized anxiety. I go out for work, but I hesitate to leave the house otherwise, especially in crowded places. I need to tackle that, but it’s a struggle right now.
I believe getting the dumbbells and starting to work out can help me a) gain mental health benefits and b) mentally prepare me to return to the gym. They’ll make me feel better and remove a significant excuse for not working out. The good news is that once I start exercising, I give it my all; the intensity has never been an issue.
You made a great point about looking for used equipment. I’ll keep an eye out, but if it takes too long or my depression holds me back from finding something decent, I’ll just buy new. I know I need to act now and address this before it spirals further.
I might suggest kettlebells instead of dumbbells. They allow for many of the same exercises but also include more mobility and cardio movements. They’re very versatile, offering a wide range of exercises.
For someone with lifting experience, starting with dumbbells or kettlebells in the 30-60 lbs range would be a good choice.
Having two adjustable weights that range from 5-55 lbs (or 2.5-52.5 lbs) can definitely help you get started.
With those and bodyweight exercises, you can achieve effective full-body workouts. If your focus is on pure strength training and muscle growth, you might reach the maximum of 55 lbs or 110 lbs on some exercises within a few weeks, but you can adjust your reps and sets to prolong that process.
If you get those and add some small items like resistance bands, you’ll have everything you need, especially if you’re incorporating cardio alongside strength training.
My suggestion is to buy the adjustable dumbbells you’re considering from Facebook Marketplace or a similar site. They tend to hold their value well. If you reach their maximum weight and need something heavier, you can always resell them later. It’s better to get some weights and start working out. If you get too strong down the line, you can address that when the time comes.